Tuesday, August 30, 2016

it's been a while

it's been a while since I last blog....

It was two years ago since my last post.. look back what have I done for the past two years, what else besides my new responsibility as a mom, while still struggling to adapt to this not-so-new place...

My cousin, Chung Hoe has passed away two days ago, and this make me wanna return to write something here. It's really painful to me as we have very close age gap and we grow up together from Kampung Pasir to Lobak.. I'm one of the youngest in the family hence he is one of the few cousin who calls me Jie Jie. There is so much emotion I have but it's too painful to put it into word.. I just don't want to think about it anymore and life goes on..

It's even more painful when I can't be there to pay my last respect to him coz Im pregnant and was told not to attend the funeral. I know my relatives just loves me and don't want anything happen on me so I don't insist, I don't want them to worry about me. Time like this makes me feel so sorrow for being home away, feeling so helpless and left out for not being able to be there for all the person I care. Everytime I miss a family gathering or trip I feel a sense of emptiness and lost.